Monday, February 8, 2010

post op day 3 - h.r. calling

Energy level: hibernating squirrel
Pain level: 4 - 6 meds: keeping pain at bay

JP ensures that I am tucked in, elevated, iced and have an ample supply of water, meds and bananas on hand before he leaves for work. I settle into my nest for a long winter nap.

My deep dreamless sleep is disturbed by the phone. It’s HR. They want to know when I’ll be back to work. I explain in slow, slurred speech that I’m on opium and “can we talk later?”

He wants to know if I’ve received the packet he fed-exed. I tell him that “I received it, but it had a lot of words so I didn’t read it.”

The doctor said I should be able to go back to work in a few weeks. I should have plenty of sick leave and vacation time to cover this incident, why am I being harassed when I should be resting?

My boss and the entire office sent me a plethora of “Get Well” cards last week that overwhelmed me with warm fuzzy feelings and made me ache to go back to work. I miss the team and I want to go back ASAP.

However, “ASAP” is not good enough for HR. He needs a date.

HR is not allowed to discuss feelings, hopes or dreams. I dearly miss my job, I hope that I can walk soon and I dream of making it to the toilet instead of pissing in a bucket. I cannot mention these things as they have no meaning to HR. He needs the facts, just the facts.

My doctor faxes a letter to HR stating that I’m incapacitated until May 10, 2010 – more that three months!

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