Energy level: sleeping beauty
Pain level: off the charts - or the new 10 - ice, ice baby!
Pain, pain, go away! Like clockwork, pain wakes me every five hours to remind me to take a pill.
I finally have an appreciation for those hospital contraptions to keep feet elevated. My personal method relies on a stack of cushions. The couch has been completely deconstructed so that the firm cushions keep my foot well elevated above my head as I sleep. I feel like the princess and the pea in some weird yoga pose.
Nature calls about mid morning. Groggily, I grab for my crutches and swing myself to sitting position.
FIRE!
PAIN!
FIRE!
My screams bring JP and some ice instantly to my side.
Instinctively, I lay down and elevate and ice my foot. The alarms have gone off in my foot and my brain is struggling to understand them. It’s only been three hours since my last pill, so the pain should be in check. Why does my foot feel like it is going to explode?
As I lay with my foot in the air I ponder this sudden strong sensation. The pain subsides and I decided to try it again, but slowly. Just as my foot dips below heart level, fire floods my foot.
I can see the door of the water closet taunting me. It’s in pain sight – so close, but so far away. I suddenly develop penis envy. If only I had a penis I could live like Howard Hughes. Instead, JP brings me a bucket.
Leave it to an engineer to come up with such a simple, yet practical solution.
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